May 22, 2009

Baby when did your hands grow so cold?

CAUTION: Reader Discretion Advised. Graphic words used.

Remember the first time I saw u while you played in the rain?
Remember the first time I laughed at you when you said something funny?
Remember the first time I smiled at you while in your arms?
Look at me and tell me do u see that girl anymore?

The first time you hit me I was blind,
I didn't see that it was the beginning of something that will never end,
Wore dark sunglasses and put on makeup to hide the bruises,
So people wouldn't see what you had done to me..

The first time you called me a bitch in front of my friends,
I laughed and looked away making it seem like a joke
Did you know I cried myself to sleep that night?
Wondering what I had done wrong? Y was I so imperfect?

The first time you gave me a fractured arm,
I was too numb... too blank.. to think straight,
All my friends told me to get away from you..
And all I could think how i could make up for my mistakes?

The first time you raped me I was scared,
That if I cried you wouldn't want me anymore,
Do u know I spent hours in the cold cold shower?
Washing away filth that wouldn't go away..

I dont know who stares at me in d mirror anymore
I dont know where did that bubbly smiling girl go
I dont know where the guy she feel in love with disappear
Baby when did your hands grow so cold?

A broken spirit...and a crushed pair of wings
Befouled violated body..and a numb mind..
You took and twisted me into someone I don't know
Baby when did your hands grow so cold?

P.S: This is a topic very close to me. I have often wondered what makes a woman stay in a abusive relationship... What is that makes her forget that she deserves better? ...Can love really be that blind?

May 20, 2009

Passing Thoughts...

It is SO worth it making someone smile. :) (smiles foolishly)

Gods been playing artistic dude for 3 days in a row.. Yesterday he went all pastel.. The evening was so bright... Orange and fiery. It was so beautiful it made me stop being panicky as I was (Isha will vouch for that!) and I decided to admire the sun go down with a silent wow. (Karan will vouch for that!) :)

And today He decided to play with water colors. First he went into sepia mode.. making everything look so beautiful I cant even find the right words.. and then it rained!!!!!!!! YAY!!!! as expected I went mad... went and played 'saakhli' with the kids. (don't ask me what that is if you don't know. :P I'll be too embarrassed to say. :D) Taught the youngest ones to make paper boats.. and jumped in the dirty puddles with the older ones. Annie plays while Mom is away. :)

Saw a cute couple walking hand in hand, oblivious to the world.. Getting wet in the rain. Watched them with a faraway smile. Missed someone. The rains tug at the heartstrings that ache the most.

"Jo tum ho toh yeh lagta hai ki mil gayi har khushi,
Jo tum na ho toh yeh lagta hai ki har khushi mein hai kami......

Tum ko hai maangti.. yeh zindagi..."

- Annie.
P.S: Its Raininggggg!!!!!! :)

May 19, 2009

Happy Bday sweetypie!!!
Hope u get all dat u deserve n much more...



May 17, 2009

To all my frnds who will be off for MBA...

Heyyyy Guys!!!! (itne saare log hai toh common note for everyone!!! :) )

I knw this is a suprize bt i jus realized hw much i will miss u guys... Suddenly everyones headers on orkut hav changed to "IIM ___ callin" .... n it jus stuck me hw much i m gonna miss u guys..

The times i had wid u in class was d most fun time ever.. d assignments n vivas n d exams...paper balls n d trips.. all d 4 years.. d hanging out.. d bday cakes n d masti.. words jus wont suffice yaar!!! all d times wid u.. made my life at VJ d most amazing time of my life..

I m sure ur future is going to be AWESOME!!! jao sab log IIM ko thoda aur awesome kardo!!! im sure wid all d scholis from around d place... they need scholi's who can freak out!!! lik u guys!! :)

All d best ppl..Chak de fatte...N rem, smile always!!! :)
will miss u all... (sniff)
Luv forever,
Annie. :)

special note i just HAD to add:
Swati, d time wid u in dance practice was amazinggg!!! ill never forget u.. ek lambi si sweetsi ladki.. always so diplomatic lik i always say.. coming from d always politically INcorrect me. .. hehe.. i m sure IIM C is lucky to get one scholi lik u.. hehe... make sure u infuse d campus wid some of d wizrds ka crazyyyyy antics.. though i m nt sure hw they will take it if u throw paper balls.... hehe... :) i soooo wish u cud hav come to d last trip.. we'll all miss u babes!!! If it wudnt hav been for a fantastic beginning of a whole new life for u... we wud hav d most perfect Bye Bye ever!!! :)

May 15, 2009

And its all over...

Cryptography. Codes. CipherText. Cool. Interesting.
Security. Viruses. Firewall. SMIME. SSL. RC4. Diagrams.
FlowCharts. Sleep. Talking. Google. Facebook. Quizzes.
NewSongs. Texting. Sleepless. Encryption. El Gamal. DES. AES. DSA.
ExamDay. Wht to wear. Paper. Crap. Yawn. SO lengthy. Sigh


Bell rings. Throws up d paper. Yell like mad. Mona n me run up n down n aisle. yelling hoarse. Group hug. Huddle. Smiles. Relief. Come out. Me yell again!!! N set of a chain effect. Ppl from above floors yell too. N heres presenting to u d batch on 2005-2009.. Btech Finally. :)

Main Gate. Class pic. Everyone say Cheeeseee... Sab Deepak ko maaro.. :P Nautanki kahi ka.. :P

Quad. Sign Teeshirts. Hugs. Pics. Basketball for d last time. Free Throw as usual. Sail thru d net. :) As usual. More pics. STARVED.

Ruia ka kattha. Frankie. Fruit Beer. Inside d cricket ground. Laugh. Stare at d couples. Make jokes. Run around. Play kiddish games. Hit ppl. Just like very other day wid d Wizards.

Grass. Sleep. Gaze at d stars. Impromptu questions and answers. First crush. Wildest dream. Make a list of everyone who liked deepak. Lolz. :P Trouble d couples again. Watch d stars. Watch d dogs makin out. LOLZ. Deepak hides his face. Throw grass on each other. Talk.

Is it really d last day as a student?

Slow walk to d station.. Is it really all over? Seems lik yesterday whn we came in to give Applied Mathematics I... was dis d last exam? Wow. time really does fly wid best frnds hm? :)

Train ride back home. Alone. Think a lot. Sweet Nostalgia.

Koi nahi yaar.. kal toh milna hi hai na.. D wizards ka magic will never end. :)

May 12, 2009

"Just me and my baby"

(written from guys point of view. :))

I used to be d star,
Bang in d middle of the crowd that used to applaud,
Making merry and cracking jokes
Hiding behind a wall that no one could break down.

Going home lonely
The guys have left with their girls
And there's no one who gives me company
Its just me. Only me.

N there she is... waiting for me
Always ready for me, silent. so silent.
She sings her song as I fire her up,
N my heart sings along.

She knows all about d dreams I saw
And about d girl who broke them apart
She knows about d times I cried and let it all out
She knows me. So well. Inside out.

She takes me away, letting me ride,
Takes me places faraway, places unknown
N I don't have to hide anymore when I'm with her
N no one judges me .. No one stares anymore.

She calls me again tonight
Into the beautiful darkness
The moon hangs low like a peep hole to another world
And the highway seems like the right way to go. Away. Faraway.

The rhymes don't make any sense
N d world fights low and dirty
U guys, I m going away for a while
Just me and my baby. For a while.

I don't care where I m going, it aint home
I don't know when Ill be back my friends
so miss me while i m gone..
There's a ride I need to get on. 
Its Personal.

Its just me n my baby tonight.

P.S: Dedicated to a special someone who loves his bike. Obsessively. :)
P.P.S : If you are a biker, tell me in one sentence what is your relationship with your bike. I'm taking a survey. :)

May 11, 2009

3 down 1 to go!!!!

DataWarehouse. Mining. ETL. DataBases. Extract Transform Load. Yawn.
Smiles. Long talks. Missed calls. Snooze. Wasted whole 3 days. Slept.
Study. Study. Flip Pages. Read Chat. Data Mining.
Poem. Engineer post. Think. Nostalgia. Architecture.
Classification. Clustering. K Nearest. Bayes Rule. NN. KDD.
Apriori. Quad Tree. Some Tree. Leaves. So jao. Zzzzz.
Call. Buttery. Sweet. Naughty. Sexy. Confused. :P
Overslept. Shit!!. Last Minute. Exam Hall. EVERYONE overslept. lolz.
Paper. Look around. **** *****. 1st bench. ##########. :O
write crap. Imagine Heros. LOST. Sawyer. Daydream. Write some crap.
Ro. Laugh. Frnds. Smile. Walk. Fruit Beer. Gossip. Pics.
Sleep. :)

P.S: Bad Paper... bt i can feel d last day drawing near. :)

May 9, 2009

Why I’m an enginner…

(A lot of this stuff won’t make any sense to the majority here. Plz pass over instead of reading this crap then. :P VJTI’ans plz continue and laugh extra loud)

1. I worship the guys who made Pentium. Seriously!! WOW they are cool!
2. I understand exactly what they mean by Intel Core2Duo T5550 @ 1.83Ghz.
3. I m a girl and STILL don’t bother to look into d mirror before I leave for college.
4. In 4 years my vocabulary has degraded to the level of the average frustrated guy who cusses all the time.
5. I have tried all settings, everywhere, on every single thing there is to change on my PC.
6. I have tried to repair all household appliances ranging from the TV remote to the ceiling fan.
7. I know how to use the soldering iron. And the jack plane. Lolz. Courtesy : BEE & Workshop. :D
8. I explain to my kindergardenrs whom I teach, things like wavelength of light and scattering when asked why the sky is blue. I even drew wht wavelength looks like. N got looks like :O.
9. Most of the times my lunch consists of a quick samosa/vada pav and chaas. (buttermilk) while simultaneously orkutting from d net lab.
10. I hav invented desperate ways such as stealing used files during submission time. (hi5 CC's… damn!!! I m so proud of myself for saving all dat money!!!)
11. I am online most of the night because of the concept that is commonly referred to as “Night Maarna”. My night time coffee is my savior.
12. I actually understand what has happened when someone says "Server is down" and “Netbeans killed my PC” (may the soul of the poor PC rest in peace)
13. I don’t dress up ever, I don’t know what half the things in d makeup box do and the concept of a date is unknown to me. :
14. The probability of finding a hot guy in my college is 0.0001.
15. I can type faster than u can blink.
16. Ok that gave me next point... I m excellent at exaggerating - courtesy 8 submissions. :)
17. I sing random lame stuff like "Tu hi toh mera HOST hai" :and write even lamer stuff like “Wails from the Wumpus world
18. I consider myself as a well dressed grl if d color of my submission file matches my top. And also if I get a compliment that refers to me as female.
19. I love to talk about processors and I love to diss trical/tronix guys (Boo to u Karan!!) abt their fixation with 8085 when d whole world lives in d age of Pentium.
20. I once proxied for "Sachin Tendulkar" in 1st sem and got thrown out of class. Ahhh… fond memories!!!
21. I think my life would have been a LOT easier if Kirchoff, Newton, Lebnidz, Taylor, Tanenbaum, Laurents, Shannon, Spohn hadn’t existed. And also for dat reason I worship TECHMAX. :P
22.My conversation starts with "Wassa" and end with "TTYL" along wid P.S tht is "if u coming 2mrw mera proxy maar. roll no 26." (oh I shud probably add this too – everyone in class knows hw to sign my name. :P)
23.I discovered my exceptional talent at being a story teller during viva's.
24.I hav copied in exams approximately 3.618 times the amount u hav actually given exams. lolz.
25. My speciality is getting mirror marks in mid sems. Lolz. i.e. 03/30, 02/20, 01/10. :P
26. I know all shortcuts and function keys on the keyboard. Ctrl-D comes in handy when u watching something u shudn’t.. (smirks) and Alt- F4 comes in handy whn ur BUSTED!!! :P
27. For me the best reasons for celebration are : Reduced Syllabus, Mass Walkout, Exam postponement and Independence Day (last day of exam)
28. My favorite word is "F***" and my favorite phrase is "SHOT diya" :P
29. Whenever I got out wid frnds I’m the one who calculates to the nearest paisa the breakdown of how much who should pay.
30. Everyone in my family and neighborhood expects me to solve all their computer failure problems. I take immense pleasure in assuming a sober tone and saying "I will hav to format ur PC. I m afraid all ur data will be gone" n then act lik a hero whn I save it all. :P
31. Laminton Road is my Mecca. (All those who don’t know bt wud lik to get d best deals on electronic gadgets anyway, get off Grant Road and ask anyone where it is. Beware of ppl who will try to sell u weird stuff. Lolz. If ur a girl, don’t go alone.)
32. I spend more time at the xerox / printout wala than at home. :)
33. I think explaining the concept of mass bunk to nerds is more difficult than explaining the colors to a blind person.
34. Almost everything tht I do always comes down to "MATH".. I think in terms like Probability of this is.., Practically speaking this should be..., Assuming that.., Given that.. :P
35. I hav contacts wid the computer wala and he updates me everytime theres smthng new in d market. :)
36. The villain’s in my life are the IMPOSSIBLE amount of viruses I hav put my laptop thru. Someppl from class actually hav a CD of all viruses seen so far.
37. I love doing the victory dance which is a cross between Joey dance and Mundu dance.. this event takes place on the last day of term which is after all submissions are done.
38. My attendance in class is proportional to how early I sleep.
39. I crack technical PJ’s. I also understand/laugh at the lamest PJ’s possible.
40. I consider 40 to be the magic number :)
41. I know what are the full forms of the different file extensions. Bet u didn’t knw “jpeg” stands for Joint Photograph Experts Group
42. I copy stuff that can’t be copied on d net (baah!! Cant copied??? Yeah ryt!!) using print screen. Simple. Duh! Courtesy : the innumerable screenshots I have taken in my 4 years at college.
43. I am 21 years old and the most memorable thing I have ever done is throw paper balls at people when they are not looking. :P
44. After hours de-stressing means playing basketball in d quad. And catching the sun do down on dat majestic dome. :)
45. I think libraries have multiple uses. They double up as sleeping rooms, gossip rooms, Timepassing rooms, Listening to music rooms, Playing schooltime games such as X’s and O’s, BINGO, Name place animal thing (LOLZ).. and sometimes something even better. (wink wink)
46. If I got a nickel for every word of crap I ever wrote (exams or otherwise) I would retire ryt now as an incredibly rich woman.
47. If I sat to calculate the amount of money I wasted on assignment sheets, xerox’s, files, printouts, d stationery & even the inners and outers and the index sheets… I would suffer from a minor heartattack. :P
48. I hav hit a rheostat in frustration (whn I discovered it had 3 arms instead of d 2 I assumed) and miraculously got the right readings!! Lolz.
49. Once I wrote a whole program that does nothing and while the professor wasn’t looking added a simple statement at the end of the program tht said “cout<<”5”;” (display 5 on screen) and made him believe my program was working!! Smart eh?
50. KK- Pal, Summer of 69’, and College Days are the songs that made me cry on Farewell. I’ll miss everything on this list. Damn!! I m choked. :(

soon-to-be-Bachelor of Computer Technology :P

May 7, 2009

2 down 2 to go!!!

Server. Client. Process. Threads. Transperency. ZzzzZ.
Backache. CORBA. Cobra. Hiss. Systems. CODA.
Missed Calls. 2 AM. Consistency. 2phase commit. Yawn.
Fault. Replication. Redundancy. Distributed. Shit.
Paper. Knw nothing. Look around. COPY. Crap. Bang head.
Limbopani. Samosa Pav. Long walk. Yawn. Sleep. FINALLY.
Nightmare. DC KT. Royally Screwed. Ab kya kar sakte hai. So jao. :P

P.S: Seriously maardi saale ne!!! &*^$$%@!

May 5, 2009

1 down 3 to go.

Multimedia Systems. Text. Images. Video. CCITT. Compression. Gtalk.
Awesome. Daisy Chaining. JPEG. TIFF. RIFF. Quick Time. mp3.
Display. RGB. Phosphor Triad. RAID. Disk, Redundancy.
Dreams. Server. Scanner. Video Conferencing. Ro. MLR 1.
Crap. 2 supplements. Snooze. 3 hours. Crap again. Done.
Sleep. Beauty Sleep. No wait. Tanenbaum. Distributed Computing. Sigh.

N here we go again. :

P.S: This aint a comeback post. Jus update. :P cudnt stay away for long naa. dats y. :)